Jacob has been in our family and in America going on 8 months now. Man, time sure goes by quickly! There have been ups and downs in those 8 months, and things haven't always gone the way I think they should have gone. However, that is how life is, isn't it? We set out to do things, things that we know we are called to do and then just expect them to be easy. I wish it were that simple. Just because we follow what God has called us to do doesn't mean things will go perfectly. However, HIS plans are always the best. Just like every child and every pregnancy is different; so is every adoption. Adopting an older child who has spent his entire life in an orphanage setting is quite different than adopting a younger child who has been in a foster family. Adjusting to being in a new country and the dynamics that come with a family is often times difficult for an older child. One of the things we have noticed is that Jacob always wants to be around us. That is a good thing you say. Yes, to some degree it is...however, there is plenty of space in the house . Playing legos and making the fighting noises in front of mom when she just wants to relax is not necessarily the best thing. Just saying. Another thing we have noticed is that Jacob needs to know exactly when we are going to do something, how long it will take and when we will get back. Time and being on schedule was a big deal in the orphanage. However, in the Worthey family time runs a little differently and is there really such a thing as a schedule?
I have come to believe that adoption postpartum is a real thing. Seriously. You spend all this time and energy getting your child home and then - just like that - they are here and part of the family. It is then you realize that things are not like you had hoped. They are forever different. I have spent time praying, crying and asking God why this isn't all I thought it would be. How come this adoption isn't like the other? His reply often comes at the strangest times. Yesterday it came to me. We went shopping to get Jacob a new pair of tennis shoes. Getting tennis shoes for Jacob is something I thought would be like the other times we have gotten shoes for our kids.. However, with Jacob, it was different. To see the smile that came upon his face as he picked them out and put them on really touched my heart. To watch him jump up and down and run ahead of the rest of us just because he had his new shoes on spoke to me. I know it was the Lord saying to me..."see, I have made Jacob, created him for just a time such as this to be in your family - to be loved by you and for you to show him My love for him." I realized then that all of my selfish desires, all the wanting things just like they were with Naomi wasn't going to be. And, for once, that was just fine.
Jacob is a blessing and a gift that we have been given by the Lord. God has big plans for our child, plans I can't even begin to imagine. I know that all the struggles we go through are just preparing us for something much bigger and greater than what is happening right now. All the frustrations I have when the kids run around and scream in this part of the house or the constant reminder to Jacob that girls are NOT he's but she's - are all part of God's bigger plan. What a privilege to say that we had a small part in the story of rescuing one of God's children and giving him the opportunity to live life and live life to its full.
One another note...please pray for us as we wait for the last piece of the adoption process. We have been given the consent to adopt Jacob, but are waiting on our government to process our fingerprints. This is taking about 16 weeks for whatever reason. Once we get that last piece, we can schedule our court day. At that time we can "officially" announce and show you all the pictures of Jacob Ford Worthey. Praying that day comes soon.
Lorrie
Jacob's new shoes! |
Aren't they nice? |
Love the honesty Lorrie :). This road isn't always easy, but we chose to obey the call of the Master and he will see us through the difficult times.
ReplyDeleteI’m glad to understand you prefer it. South Berkeley Orthodontics
ReplyDeleteWe are so very thankful to have our Jacob home with us. As Marshall said today - anything worth doing is going to be hard and take sometime. We definitely prefer it!
ReplyDeleteSuch beautiful honesty & revelation.
ReplyDeleteSo grateful for your willingness to share the journey!
We have the he/she and him/her confusion around here with our new teenager, though she often catches herself and self-corrects. I also noticed that confusion regularly in the social worker reports written and translated in the Philippines. It is a classic ESL (English as a Second Language) marker; it will likely pop up as a linguistic link to their first language for the rest of our kids' lives if they were adopted past about age 12.
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